If you love a good play on words, here are some truly great lemon puns, jokes and riddles to make you smile!
I have compiled a list of the best ever lemon puns, jokes and riddles ready to be released whenever you need a laugh. They can be also used in text messages, Instagram captions and birthday cards for any lemon related scenarios,
Without further ado, let’s dive into the best lemon puns, jokes and riddles!
THE BEST LEMON PUNS, JOKES AND RIDDLES
- Carpe lemon – squeeze the day!
- You’re simply the zest!
- You’re my main squeeze!
- Why was the lemon by himself? Because the banana split.
- Who is the most favorite singer of lemons? It must be John Lemon, for sure!
- Which type of citrus fruit is green and bitter? Lemon in a green jumper.
- When you meet an injured lemon, give it lemon-aid.
- When you face a dilemma in life, just make di-lemonade.
- The lemon finally proposed and pipped the question.
- When a lemon works overtime it gets paid half a lime.
- When a lemon falls in love it catches peelings.
- What would the lemon say to the tomato in salads? “Give me a squeeze!”
- What does the lime say to the lemon? “Sour you doing?”
- Walking down the road, I passed an apple pie, a lemon cheesecake, and ice cream. I thought the streets are deserted!
- The peel good factor.
- The next person that asks for a concoction of lemon juice, pineapple juice, and orange juice with fruits is getting a punch.
- The lemon visited the doctor because it was not peeling well.
- The lemon robbed the bank with its partner in lime.
- The lemon pie went to the dentist because it needed peelings.
- The lemon lawyer declared “I zest my case!”
- The lemon is feeling said, she just lost her zest.
- The lemon failed its driving test because it kept peeling out.
- The lemon didn’t do well at school because it couldn’t concentrate.
- The lemon decided to hang out with a prune because it could not find a date.
- The lemon crosses the road because it would like to play squash.
- When life gives you lemons, just find salt and tequila and enjoy the party!
- The lemon answers the phone by saying “yellow!”
- The baseball keeps its lemonade in the pitcher.
- People laugh when the lemon says it has a new car until they see its new lemon-sine.
- One lemon said to the other lemon, “we are zest friends forever!”
- One lemon met another and the zest is history.
- My wife asked me to pick up a single lemon at the grocery store. But I have no idea how to tell if the lemon is in a relationship or not!
- Lemons are positive fruits. They always squeeze the day.
- Lemons always apply sun lotion because they peel all the time.
- Lemon and limes love to fight. They are bitter rivals.
- If a lemon curd, it would.
- The lemon went to the doctor because it had a sour stomach.
- I went to the supermarket to buy lemons but they didn’t have any. It was a fruitless trip!
- I just lost my job at the lemonade store because I couldn’t concentrate.
- I gave a woman some lemonade last night and schwepped her off her feet.
- I can’t wait to squeeze you!
- I ate the lemon because it looked so a-peeling.
- Don’t you just love lemons? They are sub-lime!
- Do you know that limes and lemons often fight with each other? They are actually bitter components.
- Do you know dino-saurs? They used to dominate this planet in the early citrus era.
- Did you hear about the lemons that got sick? They got lime disease.
- Bitter late than never!
- All you seed is love!
- Take a walk on the wild seed!
- A lemon went for dinner with a lemon couple and felt like a fifth peel.
- A lemon was given only one minute to clean her house so she hired a Minute Maid.
- A lemon uses pickup limes to get a date.
- A dinosaur eating a lemon is a Tyrannasourest Rex.
- A cowboy lemon runs through the wild zest.
- A cat that eats lemons is a sour puss.
- When lemons start fighting all hell breaks juice!
- “This lemon is too sour” he said bitterly.
- Why did the lemon stop rolling down the hill? It ran out of juice.
- What do you call a dancing pie? Lemon Merengue.
- What kind of lemon performs for charity? Lemon Aid.
- What is yellow and solves your problems? Lemonade because it’s yellow and aids to solve your problems!
- When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in people’s eyes.
- Take life with a grain of salt, a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila.
- A girl goes to church a week before her wedding to confess her sins to the priest. “Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.” “Tell all of your sins, my daughter.” “Oh, Father, last night my boyfriend made hot, passionate love to me seven times,” she says. The priest thinks about this long and hard and says, “Take seven lemons, squeeze the juice into a tall glass and drink it.” “Will this cleanse my soul of my sins?” the girl asks. “No,” the priest says, “But it’ll wipe that smile off your face!”
- My girlfriend keeps rubbing lemon skin all over herself. I think she’s pozest!
- I got my paycheck with a lemon slice on it today. Turned out my ex-wife was garnishing my wages.
- What did the pickle say to the lemon? “I relish our time together!”.
- Needless to say, the search for the stolen lemon tree remained fruitless.
- What do you call it when you eat lemons at sunset? The golden sour.
I hope you have enjoyed my selection of lemon puns and jokes.
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