150 Basketball Puns And Jokes That'll Make You Laugh Till You Dribble

Check out this huge collection of hilarious basketball puns, jokes, riddles, and one-liners that will make any basketball fan laugh hard!

Basketball is one of the most popular sports in the world, but it’s also a topic for great jokes and funny quotes.

If you are looking for hilarious and witty basketball puns and jokes, you are definitely in the right place!

I have gathered the 150 funniest basketball puns, jokes, riddles, and one-liners below.

These 150 basketball puns are perfect for watching a basketball game with friends or for any basketball-related captions, such as Instagram posts.

If someone you know is a basketball fan, they will definitely appreciate these basketball puns!

Let’s jump straight into these hilarious basketball puns and jokes!

150 Ridiculously Funny Basketball Puns And Jokes

So here’s the list of the best basketball puns and jokes. Enjoy!

Why is a referee like an angry chicken? They both have foul mouths.
Why is the basketball arena hot after the game? Because all the fans have left.
What do you call a basketball player that misses dunks? Alley Whoops.
How do you keep a Milwaukee Bucks player out of your yard? Put up a basketball net.
What does a basketball player say when he misses? “Shoot.”
Why can’t basketball players go on vacation? They aren’t allowed to travel.
Why did the elephants stampede onto the basketball court? They played for the Chargers.
Where is a basketball player’s favorite place to eat? Dunkin’ Donuts.
What is the favorite sport of a bass fish? Bass-get-ball.
Why do basketball players wear bibs? Because they dribble.
Basketball players always drop cookies into their milk. That way, it’s a slam dunk.
What would a basketball game set in heaven be named? Sky rim.
Which dinosaur was the best at playing basketball? The LeBrontosaurus.
Why was Cinderella a bad player? Because her coach was a pumpkin.
Which animal is best at basketball? A score-pion.
Twelve millionaires gathered around a TV watching the NBA finals is called what? The Detroit Pistons.
What did the triangle offense scream at the ball? “You’re pointless.”
What has a net but can’t catch? A basketball hoop.
I showed my new wife our new home, a basketball-playing arena. She said she’d rather settle out of court.
Low-wage workers play basketball. Tradesmen go bowling. Middle managers play softball. Upper managers play tennis. CEOs play golf. The lesson: the higher you climb, the smaller your balls get.
What do you call a communist basketball tournament? Marx Madness.
What’s the difference between a female basket and a male basket? Basketballs.
What do the stock market and Knicks season ticket holders have in common? They both get negative returns.
If a basketball player gets an athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get? Missle toe!
What’s the difference between treasury bonds and OKC fans? Treasury bonds eventually mature.
What do you call an unbelievable story about a basketball player? A tall tale.
Who was the poet of basketball? Longfellow.
What’s a pirate’s favorite basketball move? Jump hook.
What do basketball cheerleaders drink before they go to a basketball game? Root beer!
What do you call a monkey that wins back-to-back titles A chimpion.
What would you get if you crossed a basketball with a newborn snake? A bouncing baby boa.
Why is the basketball arena always hot often after games? Because all the fans have left.
Why was the basketball court wet? Because the players kept dribbling on it.
Why are basketball players good at handling breakups? Because they can always rebound.
Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? Because she ran away from the ball.
Why basketball players are messy eaters? Because they are always dribbling.
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens. He was learning how to draw fowls.
If you make the mistake of playing basketball with pigs, they will hog the ball.
You cannot get a basketball game fairly officiated in the jungle because cheetahs are all over.
The main difference between a dog and a basketball player is that one dribbles while the other drools.
Why do basketball players fail their tests in school? Because they do not want to pass.

The only time a basketball team can chase a baseball team is five after nine.
Which basketball player would be a great spokesperson for autumn? Tacko Fall.
Where do basketball players get their uniforms? New Jersey.
Why are street thugs so good at basketball? Because they know how to shoot, steal, and run.
What did the player on the Bumblebee basketball team say after making a foul shot? Hive Scored!
What are the favorite video games of basketball players? Shooting stars.
What do you call a basketball player with allergies? Scott Epipen.
Basketball is the only sport where the basket is filled but never gets full.
Why do basketball players love cookies? Because they can dunk them!
Why didn’t the nose make the basketball team? He didn’t get picked.
What does a hunter do with a basketball? He shoots it!
If you rush a circumcision to watch the start of a basketball game, you are quickly taking the tip off not to miss the tip-off.
How do basketball players stay cool during a game? They stand near the fans.
I’d never shoot if you were a basketball because I’d always miss you.
What violation do ghosts get called for the most in basketball? Ghoul tending.
What do you call a person who walks back and forth screaming one minute, then sits down weeping uncontrollably the next? A basketball coach.
Why was the basketball court wet? Because people were dribbling on it!
Why did people in the NBA think Michael Jordan was conceited? Because he was always putting on Airs.
I’ve got a great idea for an NBA-themed fast-food restaurant. I call it Shake-Shaq.
Do you know why the referee got fired from the NBA? Because he was a whistleblower.
Why the basketball player could not listen to his music? Because he broke a record!
What is Santa’s favorite basketball team? The New York Old St. Nicks.
What do you do when you see an elephant with a basketball? Get out of the way.
Why don’t basketball players don’t like to leave their hometowns? They hate traveling so much.
What do you call the basketball move where you drink too much alcohol and score? Slam Drunk!
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
My dad is really good at basketball. He always told me, “I’ve been Duncan all my life.”
I invited my flat-earther friend to play basketball. He brought a frisbee with him.
Why did the fish refuse to play basketball? He was afraid of the net.
What’s the difference between Basketball players and Soccer players? Basketball players get actual injuries.
What do you call a shark that plays basketball? A Sharq.
What do an angry bunny and a pro basketball player have in common? Mad hops.
They always asked me if I played basketball because I was tall. They stopped asking me that when I asked them if they played mini-golf!
What do you call a basketball player who smells really good? Kevin Deodurant.
I used to be addicted to basketball, but I rebounded.
How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.
What did the March say to all the madness? “What’s all that bracket?”
Why did Ron Artest leave the game early? He wanted to beat the crowd.
How do you know when it’s LeBron James’ Birthday? Everyone gets to leave work 12 minutes early.
Why are frogs so good at basketball? Because they always make jump shots.
What did the triangle offense say to the ball? “You’re pointless.”
What does a basketball player do when he loses his eyesight? Become a referee.
What do you call a fantasy show about basketball? Hooper-natural.
What’s the difference between the Miami Heats and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
What do you call 12 millionaires around a TV watching the NBA Finals? The Detroit Pistons.
Which are the best animals in basketball? A score-pion.
What does a Miami Heat fan do when his team has won the NBA Finals? He turns off the PlayStation.
If Shaquille O’Neal was a shade of blue, he would be Shaquille O’Teal.
What is the difference between a Suns’ fan and a baby? The baby will stop whining after a while.
How many New York Knicks players does it take to change a tire? One, unless it’s a blowout, in which case they all show up.
Why doesn’t Albany have a professional basketball team? Because then New York City would want one, too.
What do you call a Knicks player with a championship ring? A senior citizen.
What’s the difference between Kevin McHale and time? Time passes.
Basketball sued tennis for no reason. Now they have to go to court.
My tennis career has taught me I can be the best basketball player ever. Nothing but net.
Did you know Steven Spielberg and John Williams like to play basketball together? He shoots, he scores.
Did you hear about that bloody hilarious basketball team? The Hemoglobetrotters?
How did the guy with no hair do during his basketball game? Oh, he bald.
Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players? They dribble all the time.
I couldn’t figure out why the basketball kept getting larger and larger. Then it hit me.
The anti-vax basketball team lost every game this season. Apparently, they never take any shots.
Basketball players are the most upstanding members of society. They are people to look up to.
Why did the basketball team join a craft club? Because they wanted to learn how to make baskets!
I was going to pass it to you… But the hoop was open first.
What’s the difference between the New York Knicks and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
What’s the difference between a Sun’s fan and a baby? The baby will stop whining after a while.
What do Bulls fans do after Chicago wins the championship? Rewind the VHS tape.
What do you call a shrimp that’s good at basketball? Leprawn James.
Basketball players are afraid of themselves. They don’t like great heights.
A brawl took place in a basketball game. A judge came in and used his gavel to stop it. He brought order in the court.
Did you hear about that new sci-fi basketball show? It’s called Hooper Natural.
Why are spiders great at basketball? Because they’re eight-footers.
Why did the basketball player visit the bank? His checks were all bouncing.
Why can’t dinosaurs play basketball? Because they’re extinct.
Why has Europe never won Olympic gold in basketball? Because Europe is not a country.
How does a basketball player remain cool during a game? He stands near the fans.
What is the difference between treasury bonds and OKC fans? Treasury bonds eventually mature.
Do you know what the stock market and Knicks tickets holders have in common? Both get negative returns.
Our basketball coach loves dogs. He has three-pointers.

Where do players take their dates to party after the game? To the basket ball.
Why did the nose not make the basketball team? Didn’t get picked.
What do you call a piece of cheese that likes to shoot hoops? Swiss!
Toronto missed an opportunity to call their basketball team the Torontosaurus Rexes.
What do you call a dozen millionaires watching the playoffs on TV? The Minnesota Timberwolves.
Offensively, James Harden is outstanding. Defensively, he’s just out standing.
My friend Tim, the basketball player, is so stubborn! He’s always doing things the Hardaway.
Who’s the best basketball player in a galaxy far, far away? Kobe-Wan Kenobi.
Did you hear about the basketball player who tried to shoot hoops on a hockey rink? Scottie Slippen.
What do you call basketball goals in Hawaii? Hula hoops.
People on Tinder must be terrible at basketball. Everyone on there says they love traveling.
Did you know the name of the prequel to the best basketball movie ever? Hoosier daddy.
My wife asked if I wanted to play basketball or make fruit salad. I told her she was mixing apples and oranges.
Legend has it that basketball used to be played with glass beads, and we only started using rubber balls in the 1800s. Switching was indeed a marbleless idea.
What do you call a pumpkin that can slam dunk a basketball? Michael Gourdan.
I saw a man walking through an airport holding a basketball. Must’ve been traveling.
Why does every retired basketball players open a brewery? Because they’ve got hops.
Why was the basketball player arrested? He was caught dunk-driving.
I’ve never lost a game of football, basketball or volleyball! Though I’ve never played a game, either.
What does the Basketball player with IBS wear? Gym sharts.
A blue whale is so large that if you laid it end to end across a basketball court, the game would be canceled.
What’s the first meal of the day called for basketball players? Fast Breaks!
Why are frogs so good at basketball? Because they always make jump shots!
Why are babies good at basketball? Because they’re always dribbling!
How do you keep a Milwaukee Bucks player out of your yard? Put up a basketball net.
Why is basketball such a messy sport? Because the players are always dribbling everywhere!
Which basketball player wears the biggest sneakers? The one with the biggest feet!
What did the announcer say about the team that kept losing? They’re a team in transition – they’re going from bad to worse.
What do you call a shrimp that’s really good at basketball? Leprawn James.
Why is cupid bad at basketball? When he shoots, someone else scores.

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